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30 of 30 (100%) achievements earned:
Personal Achievements
 

NotEvenRemotelyFair.WAD

Die within 5 seconds of starting a game on Selaco Must Fall difficulty
Unlocked 17 Jan @ 6:54pm

Marathon Runner

Take 15,000 steps in a single Campaign save
Unlocked 8 Jan @ 5:39pm

Reporting for duty!

Suit up
Unlocked 1 Jan @ 8:19am

Safe Heaven

Unlock your first Safe Room
Unlocked 9 Jan @ 9:34am

Pub Brawl

Start an argument at The Broken Seal
Unlocked 9 Jan @ 6:03pm

Power Overwhelming

Obtain the Railgun Prototype from Starlight
Unlocked 17 Jan @ 4:22pm

Daily Bonus

Claim a free daily drink at the Mall
Unlocked 13 Jan @ 5:28pm

Little Plushy Man

Safely return Wilson the Bear to Dawn's home
Unlocked 11 Jan @ 4:36pm

AFK

Spend 1 hour inside a 'Xen Wellness Center' sauna without interruption
Unlocked 9 Jan @ 11:38am

Crime Averted

Save a fish from suffocation
Unlocked 1 Jan @ 8:18am

Myth, busted!

Cause a toilet to explode without using explosives
Unlocked 8 Jan @ 2:16pm

Humiliation!

Defeat a Juggernaut with your fists
Unlocked 16 Jan @ 2:19pm

Death Incarnate

Kill 1,000 Enemies
Unlocked 14 Jan @ 5:23pm

Buddy System

Buddy-up with Jonathan
Unlocked 14 Jan @ 5:26pm

Sharp and Shiny

Obtain all upgrades for a single weapon
Unlocked 14 Jan @ 6:53pm

Sharp Shooter

Land a Headshot Kill from at least 70 meters away
Unlocked 13 Jan @ 4:36pm

Gwyn Simp

Spend at least 5000 Selver in a single Gwyn Machine session
Unlocked 10 Jan @ 6:33pm

Unionize!

Get 100 Minimum-Wagers in Burger Flipper
Unlocked 11 Jan @ 2:57pm

Humanity's Second Chance

Reach the streets
Unlocked 11 Jan @ 9:05am

Homecoming

Visit Dawn's home
Unlocked 11 Jan @ 4:07pm

Death Toll

Prevent a mutation from happening, by any means necessary
Unlocked 14 Jan @ 6:49pm

Paper Forever

Fight through the Liancria Office Complex
Unlocked 13 Jan @ 4:34pm

Game Over!

Complete Chapter 1
Unlocked 17 Jan @ 5:14pm

DPS LFG

Obtain 1200 DPS at the Shooting Range in Punching Bag mode
Unlocked 13 Jan @ 4:21pm

Overkill

Kill an enemy with your Fists while having a Bunny Hopper, Protein Shake and Confidence Booster active
Unlocked 13 Jan @ 6:41pm

Save the World, bro!

Reach Level 10 in SPACE BRO
Unlocked 11 Jan @ 10:50am

It's not a bug, it's a feature!

Trigger a Trash Tornado
Unlocked 13 Jan @ 7:18pm

Mozzarella Miracle!

Get very lucky by finding a full box of pizza
Unlocked 19 Jan @ 8:54am

Embrace The Chaos

Complete Chapter 1 in Special Campaign
Unlocked 19 Jan @ 1:24pm

Strongbox

Unlock an Encounter Chest in Special Campaign
Unlocked 13 Mar @ 11:36am