i JERKED OFF TO YOU LAST NIGHT

I've just been sent a grilled cheese picture, absolutely lovely! Inbox is still open for more entries!

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Kept you waiting huh

I'm suck your toes

Jealousy is an evil construct that can only be vanished by clear eyes and an unbending view of what is true and what is not

That never happened

Remember our first kiss under the bleachers

i love you

nice esp hack kid. get a life.

leave

hey, sorry I saw your profile and I just thought you looked cute in your picture, I really wanted to tell you that)) It's really rare to see cute guys playing video games haha! I don't know why its a guy thing honestly im like really against man-hating and like ill be the one in the kitchen making sandwiches. We should really play l4d2 sometime its a really cool zombie game with a lot of scary moments, but don't worry ill be there to protect you ;) sorry that wasnt flirting I swear Im just trying to be friendly I really like your profile picture sorry was that too far? Really sorry i'm really shy I don't go out much haha add me on skype we should talk more you look really nice and fun xxx

most sus player ive met in a game of hunt nice job.

hi

I am lonely

please play with me

he
k

I suggest you watch your back

I hope you learn that something will happen to you when you do bad stuff

i went to italy and they spoke in some weird language i couldn't understand, im in my hotel room right now afraid that they are plotting to mug me in the streets at night

i could write a master thesis containing the secrets to the universe, but i don't use anything other than spy pens. too cool

went scuba diving with the wife, apparently puncturing her oxygen tank with a toothpick isn't funny, it's "unethical" and "dangerous". Proof that cod lobbies are a long lost tradition. Repost if you agree

there are enough stars in the galaxy to fill a mason jar. Wild stuff.

i don't forget, i just fart

this guy is invading my blog with his vague references to songs by tool

fyi i don't live in kansas, but grilled cheese is a great substitute if skiing is your reason for maybe

went to mcdonalds and they gave me a handful of excrement, called it the McShit, I was bewildered

it's called the I-Land on Netfelx

i think it'd be a great idea for a reality show about people who believe the earth is a simulation. should be called something like simulception

Who are you to wave your finger?
You must have been outta your head
Eye hole deep in muddy waters
You practically raised the dead
Rob the grave to snow the cradle
Then burn the evidence down
Soapbox house of cards and glass so
Don't go tossin' your stones around
You must have been high
You must have been high
You must have been
Foot in mouth and head up ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥
Whatcha talkin' 'bout?
Difficult to dance 'round this one
'Til you pull it out, boy
You must have been so high
You must have been so high
Steal, borrow, refer, save your shady inference
Kangaroo done hung the juror with the innocent
Now you're weeping shades of cozened indigo
Got lemon juice up in your eye
When you pissed all over my black kettle
You must have been high high
You must have been high high
Who are you to wave your finger?
So full of it
Eye balls deep in mu

i saw interstellar, crazy how the inside of a washing machine looks so beautiful, i was pleased to find the main character made it out into the 4th dimension

Confirmed #1 best Finn player worldwide. Nominated by the WWF for best of show in 1865. Raised Jesus from boyhood to godhood. I will appear at your birthday party if all participants have schizophrenia and are prone to hysteric outbursts.

fought a raccoon today and it pulled a level 40 malachite sword like how do you grind that hard man?

Just saw the new Matrix movie and gotta say, not their best work

if someone is in a stall, tell others that enter because it's really awkward to try to open a stall when someone is inside.

took a detour to see what this guy was doing on the way to work, i don't know if i looked at him weird or something, but he told me to get away and threw his wallet at me.

just your friendly reminder to make sure the people in the stalls and urinals next to you are alright, you don't know what they're going through, so better do it then, because no one wants to be ignored ever.

My dad beats my mom sometimes but only when he drinks

I want you

How many times do you go poopy

submissions for the grilled cheese pics are still open, so don't forget to send them in!

i met this guy on the internet and i was threatened when i told him i had froyo. To quote what he said "froyo? more like froyo self into a river"

took a retirement doody and it nearly brought me into my epilogue

you ever just take a stinky and look at people around you like ༼ʘ̚ل͜ʘ̚༽ to see if they notice?

How often should fart noises come out of my wing wang

Should you be making fart noises everytime you pee

Do you fart when you pee?

my last words should be "Would you like fries with that ma'am?"