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I hope this message finds you well. I am writing to you regarding a series of recent complaints we have received from several students at Prague University.
It has been reported to us that a man with a notably impressive amount of body hair, appearing to be in his 40s, has been seen running naked across the campus daily.
Initially, this unusual sighting led many to believe it was some kind of folkloric monster, causing a considerable amount of distress and confusion among the student body.
However, after a thorough investigation, we have come to understand that the individual in question is, in fact, you.
After careful consideration and extensive discussions with both professors and university executives, we have reached a unanimous decision. Unfortunately, we must inform you that you are hereby banned from the university premises. This decision was not made lightly, but it is necessary to maintain the safety and well-being of our students and staff.
Sincerely,