Recent reviews by dappr

juliette please smother me with your thighs

chills

please remove this retarded explosive spam at the only ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ chokepoint that is operation locker

i wish i had enjoyed my time playing this game

there are 2 ways of playing it: stealth, and loud: if you're planning on playing stealth, i would suggest you skip this game. the stealth gameplay is just too bland and repetitive, and it boils down to:

- painfully crouch-walk literally everywhere.
your steps have a sound radius, displayed on your minimap, that will alert the guards inside it. the problem is, the game doesn't account for terrain elevation therefore walking in an underground bunker will still alert guards on the surface. this makes you paranoid as one step can alert 2 or more guards at the same time, so unless you have some sick aiming or deception skills, you're probably reloading a save. i ended up having to save after every little progress i made because i was afraid of some complete bs happening and losing all my progress, which i would have to do over again while crouch-walking.

- use your silenced pistol for 90-95% of your kills.
because no one bought Sniper Elite 3 to play as a sniper, am i right? though there are ways to mask the sound of your shots, like a faulty generator that makes sounds every few seconds, they are so tiresome and time-consuming to use, you're better off just sneaking up to them and using your pistol. in one of the missions, i had to cross a big open field with an enemy sniper atop of a building. if i don't kill him, i have no way of making it past him, however, the only masking noise i could use were planes flying overhead that only spawned once every 45 seconds or so, meaning if i missed, i would have to wait another minute just for another chance.

- being forced into a stupid cat and mouse minigame.
at the end of every level, you're forced to fight a tank "boss". they are all defeated in the same way: you shoot their gas tank cover off, then shoot the gas tank to make the tank explode (every level adds one extra shot needed to explode), meaning you go into this awfully boring loop of "shoot it from behind, run around it without getting spotted, shoot it from the other side, oh no, i can't see the gas tank from here, have to find another spot".
i did the whole mission stealthily without alerting the guards, why punish me with this minigame? why simply not spawn the tank to reward me for doing my objective in the way i want, instead of forcing me into going loud?
it got so bad after the second time that every time i got to that point, i wish i had looked up a walkthrough of the game just to see where the damned tank will spawn so that i can preemptively put down anti-tank mines so i don't have to destroy it myself.

now switching to the better side of the spectrum, going loud. considering that the map design for this game is actually very decent, i was surprised on how much better brainlessly sniping people without a care in the world actually felt. the dopamine hit after you shoot someone and watch as their organs get obliterated over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over agai- it got boring.

don't get me wrong, the sniping is fantastic for a 2014 game. in higher difficulties, lining up your reticle, calculating for bullet drop and the wind curving your shot, slowing down time and your heart rate. these things really make you feel like you are the soldier holding that rifle, and when you finally press your mouse button and the camera transitions into this bullet travel camera and the only thing you hear is that loud rifle shot, there is nothing more rewarding.
however, this doesn't really apply to playing loud. a missed shot is simply a missed shot, not a "♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ hell i missed my shot now they know where i am" that you would have playing stealth; just peek and shoot again, over and over again until everyone is dead. there is no punishment for missing.

in the tutorial we learn that if you stay at the same spot for too long, enemies will start to advance on your position, trying to supress your position until you have no options other than to leave, only to get shot dead while you try.
this is not true.
enemy AI is really, really bad. instead, they crouch behind the same cover for the entirety of the gunfire, until you shoot and kill them. they do not reposition, they do not advance on your position, they do not do anything besides peek every few seconds to shoot at you. sometimes, they do not stay behind cover at all! they just crouch in the open and stand there, not even shooting.
this gives no actual sense of danger. you can snipe every single enemy from the same spot you originally started until you killed everyone and the only enemies left are the ones that took cover somewhere you couldn't see. you literally have to kill every visible enemy and then walk out in the open to find out where the remaining soldiers are, because they never left their first hiding spot.

though they are scarce in this game, snipers duels are by far the best part about playing loud. they are usually somewhere far away, so it's no easy shot. you get this adrenaline rush you get every time you peek this sniper and you have one second to account for everything before they shoot you back. they are not deadly, as even hardest difficulty they still need 2 shots to kill you full health, but if they do it hurts your pride.

the story is somewhat mediocre. most of the time i didn't really know what or why i was doing something; at the end of the day some convenient spy has all the information about your next objective, so you feel like your last mission was simply "kill everyone here".
most optional objectives have no actual impact, and may even hurt you: one optional objective was to destroy an anti-aircraft machine, however while shooting it offered a sound mask for your sniper shots. now you're conflicted on destroying it or using it as an opportunity.
collectibles like playing cards do incentivise exploration and replayability, and war diaries provide you with some short stories about both sides of the war. i couldn't be bothered.

overall, this game is not garbage, but it's not good either. it does pretty well on it's main attraction, the shooting and the bullet time, but lacks pretty much everywhere else.

there are so many bugs and incompatibilities that make this game feel like the most pseudo-incomplete piece of ♥♥♥♥ triple A game and not deserving of being the most profitable game of all time

but it was good when i could still play so +1

can make a grown man cry

9/10 too much green slime damage

most incompetent devs in any video game ever

the ultimate "walk out of spawn and get mass killed by a crossmap rpg" simulator

If I could give a mixed review to this game, I would. The concept and gameplay is really fun, however the matches are not.

Matchmaking is completely non-existent. Doesn't matter if you played for 2, 20 or 200 hours, you will get matched against full veteran premades. There is no point in making the players wait 5-15 seconds, tell them "you are searching for the best match, the longer you wait the more matches you are considered for", if you're just gonna throw them in whichever match has free slots, regardless of skill level.