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We're sitting at the bar, right? Same as any other night, when my boy spots this fine blue-haired babe sitting all by her lonesome. This girl is THICC, lemme tell you. Just absolutely perfect. So my boy goes over to her and he says- he says, "Baby, me no like Drumpf."
The whole bar erupts in applause. The girl gets up an immediately starts taking her clothes off. That's when the bar tender turns around from making his drink, and- I'm not ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ you- it's Bernie ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ Sanders! He passes my boy the drink and says "This one's on the house, kid. Our specialty- Marxist Mule."
So my boy downs the drink in like 2 seconds flat, and that's when we all notice a clinking sound at the bottom of the glass. He reaches in and grabs the coin and- I swear to ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ god- it was a token for One Free College!