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9 of 10 (90%) achievements earned:
Personal Achievements
 

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Unlocked 23 Jan, 2017 @ 7:23pm

Click on door 430 five times.

Click on door 430 five times.
Unlocked 24 Jan, 2017 @ 7:21am

Achievement

This is an achievement.
Unlocked 8 Jan, 2017 @ 12:50pm

Welcome back!

Quit the game and then start it again.
Unlocked 8 Jan, 2017 @ 12:49pm

Speed run

Complete The Stanley Parable in under 4 minutes 22 seconds (not including load times)
Unlocked 24 Jan, 2017 @ 9:49am

You can't jump

No seriously, we disabled it.
Unlocked 23 Jan, 2017 @ 7:16pm

Go outside

Don't play The Stanley Parable for five years.
Unlocked 23 Jan, 2017 @ 7:10pm

Beat the game

Complete The Stanley Parable.
Unlocked 8 Jan, 2017 @ 1:12pm

Unachievable

It is impossible to get this achievement.
Unlocked 23 Jan, 2017 @ 7:07pm



Commitment

Play The Stanley Parable for the entire duration of a Tuesday.