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Skip to the sweet shop with my sweetheart, Sandy.
Got my pennies saved. so I'm a sugar daddy.
I'm her Hume Cronyn, she my Jessica Tandy.
I want candy!
I need candy bubble gum, and taffy
Get in my way punk, you're gonna get ya ass beat, nasty
Do it till your dad sees, embarrass your family
Just 'cause you came between a kid and his candy
Hear me out.
Carry a spatula around and when you see one, flip it onto its back. They're surprisingly docile once they're in that position. Then, all you need to do is gently press on its abdomen to retract its penis. It will be small: approximately the size of a thin pencil eraser. Use the tip of your tongue to manipulate it to full erection, then suck with your lips until it ejaculates: usually 30-45 minutes later. If you don't feel the rush of semen, you will know by its legs scratching playfully at your face when it gets oversensitive afterwards.
and to the virtual console, that doesn't crash when gim is performed
and to the old kakariko route, resetting the console to save time
and to the timing method, the arbitrary start and end points
my mind wanders...
to the homebrewed wii, the region freed wad,
to the replacement joystick, to the hori mini pad,
to the rubber band, tape, and grease
my mind wanders...
to the practice, the process, the savestate
to the gameshark, the game saver, the gecko code
to the cheating, the splicing, the policing
the audio waveform
my mind wanders...
to the timer, the inconsistency, the dropped frames
to the bitrate, the capture card, the interlacing
to the emulator, the graphics plugin, the deadzone
the deadzone...
i see the grand decentralization of it all
my mind wanders...
to the ique player, the fast memory card, the old gamecube laser
to the ps2 disc speed, the sloppy port, the hd remaster
to the pal cartridge, the patched glitch, the japanese text speed
to the turbo controller, the rules
the rules!
all the categories are arbitrary
perhaps marksoupial said it best:
do whatever you want, there are literally no rules
the futility of it all. the statistical waiting game
grinding endless attempts, waiting for the outlier
never enough, suboptimal, improvable
my mind wanders...
to the rng, the frame perfect timing, the human error
to the attempts, the streams, the splits
to the audience, the ♥♥♥♥ talk, the cliques
the fame
my mind wanders...
sexually harrassed, fleeing, hiding
reclusive, paranoid, getting high
playing smash, destroying my wrists
my mind wanders...
to the life i poured into it all
working in a frenzy, managing a community
disrupting speedrunning
building upon it, something new and greater
and then it fell in upon itself
jiano saw it first; i was foolish
it couldn't be unified; all the categories are arbitrary
finished painting my nails, doing my makeup
put on some mascara, roll up my thigh highs
all the categories are arbitrary
slip on a skirt, buy a new dress
feel the pain from the laser
all the categories are arbitrary
leaving the clinic, bottles in my hand
spironolactone, estradiol
all the categories are arbitrary
And if this user is also correct:
Actually, futa can be made less gay than straight porn. You see, straight porn has one guy and one girl. Because you're fapping to something with one guy in it, that's 50% gay. If you watch futa ♥♥♥♥ a girl, that's one girl and a half girl, thus only 25% gay. You could make it 0% gay with two girls but the problem is, that makes them lesbian, which wraps back to being 100% gay.
we can assume that trap on woman would be only ~1% gay, because the 2 percent and 0 percent balance. But to tip the scales, you want to also have as MANY women as possible.
With the average penis having a surface area of 175 cm2 and the average fingertip having 4cm2 surface area we can easily get 43 fingers touching one ♥♥♥♥, perhaps 44 if we're lucky. So that's .02/45, with .02 being the amount of penis. This being said, 1 trap being touched specifically on the penis by 44 women who are not touching eachother would only be 0.044444444% gay. Minimum gayness has been achieved.
A counter argument would be that female masturbation, which contains only 1 woman, would be the least gay. I think those who support this idea forget that masturbation is homosexual incest. So with that being excluded, this is the least gay porn can be.
It was a fairly ♥♥♥♥♥♥ place but I stuck around because my current wealth didn't offer high standards. At the time Death Grips didn't exist (this was 2008) and none other than Zach Hill was among the small crowd interested in the vacant flat. He was wearing a black t shirt that had "YANK CRIME" crudely written on in white paint. He smelled a bit and had long greasy hair but he wasn't all that out of place for the Sacto area.
While my Mom was professionally showing the features of the open kitchen Zach kept wandering around the room tapping on things with his open palm. And would occasionally stop and take out his phone and record him tapping on the object.
it was only until 2011 that I recognized him to be Zach Hill. Who I at the time had never heard of.
no
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