Recent reviews by smeltode

Aside from being an incredibly addicting, unique, and fresh take on the roguelike genre, Balatro does one thing in particular really, really well.

I do a lot of UI / UX Design work at my day job, and an important part of designing any software is making it feel good. You can do this in a number of ways that all sum up to your software making the user feel like they are interacting with something that reacts to them.

Balatro is a masterclass in this regard. Everything reacts to you hovering on it, clicking on it, interacting with it in general. Every action you take, the game responds. It might be just simply with a slight visual change and a small sound effect, but the game expressly lets you know, at every opportunity, "Yeah, I'm here. You're playing Balatro. We're dancing in the moonlight together. We're like Ryan Gosling and Emma Stone during the City of Stars sequence in La La Land. We're gonna make sweet, sweet love to each other all night."

And you haven't even played your hand yet.

Mult. Mult. Chip bonus. Mult.

Winter Soldier. AGAIN.

Mult. Seal Effect. Money. Mult. Money. Again.

God this game rocks dude. Nothing but praise to the solo dev, LocalThunk, and the guy behind the soundtrack, LouisF.
They cooked.

Oi. Big boy. Come here, you. Just look at that. Just touch it. It's ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ rushed.

I hold the first of Insomniac's Spider-Man games in really high regard, and I do think Miles Morales was a really solid spin-off too, so I had certain expectations for this game.

Unfortunately, Spider-Man 2 doesn't quite live up to the standard the first game set - in some regards. It is largely, a great game, and it has a lot of the hallmarks of a great sequel - expanded game mechanics, improvements in graphics, sound design, etc... but it's just not enough. Yes, we have a bigger, and denser map than ever, packed with new things to collect, things to do, fun quests that serve to build the world our characters live in, and yet this is all overshadowed by the questionable writing and pacing of the main story.

There is a distinct moment towards the later half of the game where the story becomes "Peter Parker Apologizing Simulator". It's not good. It feels like this game forgot how goated Peter was in the first game in favor of somehow boosting Miles and MJ into the spotlight. And like, yeah, I get it, and I love Miles, but that's my boy right there. The OG. We can't just cuck Peter like that. And stop making me play as MJ. It makes absolutely no sense that she would be capable of sneaking up on and 1 tapping 250 pound bald eastern europeans who probably eat raw onions for breakfast and presumably have extensive training in hunting and combat.

And then the main story ends. The whole thing happens at a breakneck pace, and before you know it, multiple insane arcs come to an end and an equal amount of arcs get completely forgotten about. Peter's mortgage is like 5 grand. How the ♥♥♥♥ is he gonna pay that? Give me these Peter Parker stories. One of the best moments in the first game is when he gets evicted from his apartment. Moments where we are reminded that Peter is just a dude trying his best are what make him such a relatable and likable character.

I am disappointed, because clearly, they just needed more time. The combat is tighter and has more options, and the movement is the best its ever been. It's so much faster, and there are so many fun mix ups you can do, like the loop-de-loop and the web wings. Getting around the city and doing alert missions with all the cool new abilities the game added, parrying and dodging enemies and chaining sick aerial combos - the moment to moment gameplay is stellar and a serious bar above the previous instalments. It is seriously, seriously good, and the boss fights are actually interesting this time too. Memorizing boss patterns and stringing parries and dodges together is something I associate with games like Elden Ring or Jedi: Survivor, but it works really well here too.

Overall, we're left with a solid game lacking a good story to back it up. And when the story in the first game felt like a true love letter to the character because it was done so well, and set the bar so high, it really does just hurt a little extra. I hope hope hope Insomiac just gets more time to develop Spider-Man 3. We know what they're capable of, and I trust they can show it.

Moral of the story: give me more Black Cat. I desperately need her to beat me within an inch of death.

One last thing: the suits in the final act? What, it was time for a "Miles Morales original"? Yeah. That ♥♥♥♥ was ass. Never let bro cook again.

This game gets a solid "Damn. What a shame." on the Gordon scale.

PS: any discussion about this game being "woke" is ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ braindead. If you're the kind of person who feels threatened by a tiny sidequest where you help a dude ask his boyfriend to prom, not only are you stupid, but you clearly don't understand Spider-Man as a character. Because that small scale, menial ♥♥♥♥ like saving cats from trees or helping someone ask someone to prom, is exactly what being a "Friendly Neighborhood" hero is all about. Spider-Man wouldn't give a ♥♥♥♥ whether someone is gay, purple, an alien, or any other denomination inside or outside of any spectrum you can think of. Be more like Spider-Man.

When OW2 came out I fell in love with the game and the hero shooter genre. I clocked like 300 hours one-tricking Ana, and had a blast. Unfortunately, OW2 is kind of ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥, Blizzard is a ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ joke of a company, and where that game used to tickle my moba itch I've relapsed on League of Legends, so my overall motivation to play OW2 has been really low. They also, y'know cancelled the ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ PVE mode, can't figure out how to monetize or balance the game well, etc etc.

I was expecting rivals to give me a huge spark to enjoy hero shooters again, but it just hasn't hit the same for some reason. I don't know if it's because when I play Rivals it makes me want to play OW2, or if it's because too much of my gaming real estate is occupied by LoL at the moment, or what really. But it just hasn't done it.

Which is a shame, because Rivals is actually really good, and I'm a huge comic nerd (See my review of Marvel's Spider-Man). Rivals does a lot right. 6v6 is great, the art style is unique and gorgeous, and it's fun to see so many cool Marvel characters come to life in a competitive game. I strongly feel they've done justice to pretty much everyone in the roster, and it's so cool to see them portrayed in interesting ways. Samurai Psylocke? Yeah, slice me, mommy.
It's also really great to hear these characters' iconic VA's portraying them. Steve Blum, Yuri Lowenthal, and more are doing their thing and it really adds to how authentic Rivals feels. This is a game that feels like care was put into it, no doubt.

With such a strong foundation it's hard to nitpick issues about it, but there are really just two major things I can't stand so far:

1. Performance. It's actually a shame this game runs like absolute ♥♥♥♥. That's one of the few things OW2 blows this game out of the water in comparison on. It is extremely difficult to play well in competitive mode when I'm routinely dropping below 60 FPS. I'm constantly above 200 FPS in OW2 and that game honestly looks only marginally worse. They've gotta work on this.

2. Balance. Waiting for Luna and Mantis to rotate their ults so you can actually play the game is very boring, and I main support, so it's not like I'm being your typical 3 IQ Moon Knight player whining about "healers". It's just tiring to see the same supports like, every match, and consistently being able to completely nullify like 90% of the roster by pressing Q on Luna gets old quick.

Rivals has a ton of potential, and I can't wait for them to tighten it up. I can see myself really loving this game, but in it's current state I'd categorize it as just "great". Which, hey, is still really good! It's totally worth your time, and if you have an OW2 itch like me that OW2 can't scratch because that game, again, ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ stinks, then try Rivals. There's a lot to appreciate here.

It's actually just kind of nice to play a good indie game that is relatively tight in scope. MiSide does its thing and does it well. Great game, lots of great moments.

Cappie is best girl.

How SOTE differs compared to the base game is difficulty. It's hard as hell. Bosses are tough to say the least, and regular enemies are absolute menaces in this expansion. You really have to change your approach to combat and start preparing for fights: hotswapping your armor, weapons, ashes of war, Physick tears, talismans, consumables, and strategies is crucial for surviving the combat encounters in the Realm of Shadow, and makes it feel that much more satisfying to come out on top when its because you fine tuned your character using supplies you collected over your whole playthrough. I'm not exaggerating when I say I literally did not use the crafting system a single time across my 500+ hours pre-SOTE, but certain bosses and enemies kicked my ass so hard in this DLC that I needed to actually craft consumables that granted bonus resistances, just to try and sway odds back towards my favor.

I think this is good game design. Obviously, you can raw-dog everything in Elden Ring, but if the difficulty is cranked so hard that you have to exhaust all available resources and game mechanics, I think that makes for a fun, cohesive experience. I got by in the base game without doing so, but I think I would've enjoyed it even more had I used this approach the entire time. The feeling of being pit against insurmountable odds is potent in this DLC, and I loved every moment of it.

Gameplay was not the only thing that impressed me. The pure spectacle of many different situations and environments blew me away. (gorgeous view ahead) I took a ton of screenshots because there were so many different areas that were beautiful. There were multiple boss fights that I think were designed to be visually memorable rather than flawlessly designed combat encounters, and personally, I appreciate that. There were also multiple times where I had to pause and enjoy the soundtrack (shaman village... plin plon). The quests are familiarly cryptic, but actually more digestible than the base game in my opinion, and that was a welcome change. I enjoyed them, and I think FS succeeded at making me feel certain emotions if that was their goal. Story spoiler: I'm not sure why I didn't see it coming, but yeah, everyone being ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ dead at the end in classic FromSoft fashion was still a gut-punch for me. I really liked Thiollier, Moore, and even Ansbach. (lovable sort ahead)

However, I don't think SOTE is flawless. For example, the Furnace Golems are a joke, don't get me started on how bafflingly poorly designed those encounters are when compared to the rest of the field bosses the game has to offer. Some story bosses have questionable gameplay design choices too. Although SOTE holds the highest rating of any DLC ever on Metacritic, I think that has more to do with how good Elden Ring is than how good SOTE is individually.

That said, this expansion is truly fantastic. It's massive, packed with content, and I strongly recommend playing it. It's about as good, if not slightly better than the base game when evaluated as a standalone, cohesive experience, and we're talking about Elden Ring here, so yeah, that's pretty ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ amazing.

Elden Ring + Shadow of the Erdtree is probably my second favorite game of all time now. Sorry Skyrim, I still love you. But FromSoft didn't just cook with this; they were on some Gordon Ramsay type ♥♥♥♥, and I'll gladly hope and pray for thirds if the seconds were this good.

yeah this ♥♥♥♥ dont even make no ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ sense

Coruscant is basically the prologue section of the game and for some reason the game has a hard time running nicely during that part. but once you leave, the game starts to perform how you'd expect. game is sick so far, I'l update this later when i finish it. Just wanted to say dont let the negative reviews throw you off too hard, the game is glaringly better than fallen order basically off rip so if you liked that one then get this one too. Also to everyone having a rough go with the Rancor... Remember Oggdo Bogdo? Yeah. Just you wait.

Edit: May 1 Patch vastly improved performance on Coruscant for me. night and day difference. Would still like to see some improvements on Koboh though.
An unfortunate side effect of the patch though is that crash frequency has increased by a good chunk, particularly noticeable in my experience when doing Force Tears (Evergaols) and also Alt-Tabbing. The game either completely freezes, forcing me to kill it with Task Manager, or, it completely crashes my graphics drivers, making my entire PC lock up for a couple seconds, making both my monitors go black until they reset. Remember how when Elden Ring crashes, when you boot it up again it drops you exactly where you left off? Yeah. This game doesn't. So if you go treasure hunting for an hour without touching a Site of Grace and the game decides to cuck you, you now have to repeat that hour of gameplay. This is a AAA 2023 release.

Also, what AAA developer releases a game in 2023 without DLSS? I mean, AMD FSR is fine, and it's certainly the more globally compatible option, but was why not both? This might be the only game I can think of that only has FSR and not DLSS. What a weird decision.

The only other criticism I have for this game is that Jedi Grandmaster difficulty feels ridiculous sometimes. When the game can't think of a new boss to throw at you, it'll just throw 2 or 3 of an old boss at you, which is insane considering how aggro they are. maybe I suck, but double Rancor Evergaol and double Oggdo Evergaol are ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ brutal. In either case, they both throw massive fast hitboxes at you with basically no time to breathe, if you miss a parry your poise meter gets instantly depleted, stunning you, and the Rancors like to throw this huge unblockable grab move at you where if it connects, it's an instant kill/oneshot every time.

But then sometimes the game has really epic bosses that just have a learning curve. Second Encounter Rayvis (Especially Phase 2) is a straight up Sekiro boss. So if you were struggling like me for a couple hours, get ready to lock in and start memorizing his combos. Parry/Perfect Dodge his strings and weave in 1 or 2 attacks when you have a (small) window. When you win, it feels awesome, because it's not like it was unfair at any point, you just had to git gud.

I'll update again when I beat the game.

It's really such a shame that this game has been plagued by performance issues since launch, because it's one of the more notable releases from 2023, which was one of the most incredible years for gaming, ever. In my eyes, Jedi: Survivor is quite literally a perfect sequel to Fallen Order, and an amazing single player experience on its own.

Survivor expands upon every single mechanic and element that was already done well in Fallen Order and then tops it. And it just keeps doing this throughout your playthrough. I consistently had moments where I thought, okay, surely this is where the game has a lull in momentum, or stops doing everything so well, and it just never did. I was blown away by this game. Combat is tighter yet more expansive, the level design is more interesting and has more depth, the story is captivating, and they went ham with the collectibles and customization. There's some serious Elden Bling to wear.

Full stop, this is how you do a sequel.

This game reminds me of Cyberpunk. People love to ♥♥♥♥ on games that are poorly optimized, or have technical issues of any kind, and yeah, that's super valid and important. Games are ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ expensive nowadays, and we absolutely should hold studios to a higher standard of quality. But I must've just rolled the dice pretty good because every issue I ran into wasn't a big enough deal for me to turn off the game. No, my experience wasn't perfect from a technical standpoint, like I doubt anyone's was. However, like Cyberpunk, underneath the negative press, random crashes, FPS drops, and mass review bombing, lies a seriously exceptional game that Respawn clearly put their heart and soul into. I love this game and the story it tells and I strongly recommend you play it.

I'm a ♥♥♥♥♥.

I have a hard time playing Binding of Isaac for long sessions because the music freaks me out. So, when one of my friends convinced me to play the Resident Evil 4 Remake Chainsaw Demo, I was reduced to a whiny twerp jumping at every single noise and shift in the music. To my surprise though, I found myself wanting more.

I bought this game and decided to give it a try to help me decide on whether or not I'd get RE4R, and I'm glad I did. RE2R is an exceptional game. The atmosphere is palpably unsettling, the music and sound design are outstanding, and the metroidvania-esque progression is satisfying and addicting. I had my pants scared off multiple times and would gladly have them scared off again. The horror elements are pulled off with expert precision, and the perfect amount of action setpieces are mixed in to keep you engaged.

RE2R is an absolute thrill. This game was my gateway drug, and I wholeheartedly recommend it especially if you're new to the genre like me.

Also, Ada is mommy.

Despite the open-world singleplayer RPG genre continually devolving into pointless fetch quests, poorly written dialogue, and excessive hand-holding, Elden Ring stands out by doing everything exactly how other games don't - and it works beautifully.

This is essentially my first Souls game. I very briefly played DS3, and barely played Sekiro, so I began Elden Ring with an open mind and virtually no expectations. I assumed I'd be in for an interesting, combat centric pseudo-RPG that would be confusing and frustrating.

That's what I got, however for some reason, despite initial frustrations with difficulty, the overload of information that is the stats screen, and the complete lack of guidance in what to do, Elden Ring is absurdly captivating. The environments are varied and gorgeous, dungeons are clearly crafted with care and attention to detail, and characters are interesting (lovable sort ahead).

This is the first game that has had me absolutely and entirely immersed since some of my all-time favourite single-player experiences such as Fallout: New Vegas or Skyrim. The Lands Between is an expanse packed to the brim with fun content, interesting loot, and once you start exploring you never want to stop. The questlines are interesting (though you'll definitely need some help from Fextralife), and the boss fights are straight up epic. The music is downright beautiful and the visuals are so unique, so stylized, and so gorgeous in so many different ways.

I have tried to write and rewrite this review for months, and every time, I feel dissatisfied with my own ability to convey exactly how much this game has blown me away. But now, I think I've found the perfect way to put it:

I put down Elden Ring after playing non-stop, clocking almost 300 hours. Wanting to scratch my open world RPG itch, I revisited Witcher 3 and put in a cool 70 hours then put it down for a reason I couldn't understand. So I put together a new Skyrim modlist, spent probably 30 hours modding and troubleshooting and then another 30 playing, then put it down for a reason I couldn't understand. Hogwarts Legacy came out, and despite my love for the Harry Potter universe, for some reason I couldn't even push myself to finish the main story. I finally relented, and came to terms with the fact that I'd just rather be playing this game.

Elden Ring is a masterpiece. It is an undeniable champion amongst a stale genre saturated with mediocrity and tired franchises. It is a tour de force, a chef d'ouvre, a pièce de résistance. Yes, I pulled up a thesaurus.

Could this be a dog?

Marvel's Spider-Man is up there. Insomniac put everything into this game and it SHOWS.

I'm a long-time enjoyer of Spider-Man. I grew up with an original Xbox, so I religiously played Spider-Man, Spider-Man 2, Ultimate Spider-Man, and then eventually when we got a Wii I played Web of Shadows. Amongst these absolute titans of the Superhero game genre, my favourite was always between Ultimate Spider-Man and Web of Shadows. Now that I'm older, I've had the chance to revisit these 2 games and I can confidently say that they stood the test of time.

And then Marvel's Spider-Man came out.

I didn't have a PS4, but I knew I would one day get my hands on this game, one way or another.

One day, one of my best friends hits me up about how he finally got a PS5 and doesn't need his PS4 anymore. He told me he's selling it along with a suite of top-tier PlayStation exclusives like God of War, the Uncharted games, The Last of Us, Bloodborne, and more. I told him I'd take it.

As soon as I hooked it up, I downloaded Marvel's Spider-Man, played it until I hit 100% on my save, then convinced myself to try Bloodborne, got too scared, and now the PS4 gathers dust in my room.

I bought an entire console essentially just to play this game.

Then, when the remastered version came out on PC, I bought the game again. And didn't put it down until I got 100% on my save, including DLCs.

And now, I'm in the position to finally say, this game is ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ peak. Not just peak video game - we've known that since 2018 when it originally released, and I'm not going to reiterate on any of the things we already know this game does well.

The greatest part about Marvel's Spider-Man is that it is undeniably true to the mythos of the Spider-Man character. This is without question one of the greatest original Spider-Man stories there is, and if you're a fan of the character or just enjoy well written single player games, you're absolutely missing out if you don't give this game a shot.

Also, Black Cat is mommy af. I don't make the rules, I just follow them.