7
Products
reviewed
69
Products
in account

Recent reviews by Abanded

Showing 1-7 of 7 entries
3 people found this review helpful
1 person found this review funny
8.7 hrs on record (5.8 hrs at review time)
All I can say is this, the whole Gengis Khan bs was a bit too ridiculous for me.
Posted 9 January.
Was this review helpful? Yes No Funny Award
2 people found this review helpful
182.7 hrs on record (169.4 hrs at review time)
Overwatch 2 is a festering abomination of pixels, a vile digital gremlin that crawled out of a corporate fever dream and spat in the face of common decency. It’s not a game; it’s a neon-colored turd circus where every second spent playing feels like voluntarily punching yourself in the frontal lobe while screaming at a wall made of broken dreams.

The balance is a schizophrenic hellscape. One second you’re obliterated by a sniper who might as well be quantum-entangled with your soul, the next you’re crushed under a payload of RNG ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ that makes actual physics look like child’s play. The maps are recycled nightmares painted over with slightly different neon vomit, like someone smeared toothpaste on a sewer grate and called it “innovation.”

Monetization is pure, unadulterated filth. Every cosmetic, battle pass, and “free” loot box is a flashing middle finger to players, a grotesque carnival of greed wrapped in empty promises and the sweet aroma of corporate desperation. Playing the game is like being trapped in a room with a screaming accountant who’s also trying to staple your genitals to a wall.

Graphically, it’s a fluorescent garbage heap masquerading as a visual experience. The “new features” are the product of chimpanzees drunk on hubris, shoved together with glue made from the tears of fired developers. Every patch, every update, every so-called “fix” is a testament to incompetence and malevolent laziness.

Overwatch 2 doesn’t exist to entertain, challenge, or engage—it exists solely to inflict suffering. It’s a blasphemous insult to human intelligence, a game-shaped cancer that should be quarantined from reality. Playing it is an act of self-flagellation, a ritual of torment for those masochists still dumb enough to believe it could be anything other than a cataclysmic dumpster fire.

In short: Overwatch 2 is a cosmic-level ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥, a neon-flavored nightmare, and the unholy spawn of corporate ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ who collectively decided to ♥♥♥♥ on every ounce of what made the original tolerable.

Update: The game is still an immense level of ♥♥♥♥, tanks think they're DPS, supports don't ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ support, cuz guess what? THEY ALSO THINK THEY'RE DPS. Someone needs to molest these people into understanding their roles, TANKS TANK DAMAGE, SUPPORTS SUPPORT THE TEAM AND HEAL. I have just about lost my ♥♥♥♥ with these mouth breathing liptards not knowing how the ♥♥♥♥ to play the game.
Posted 12 September, 2025. Last edited 28 November, 2025.
Was this review helpful? Yes No Funny Award
1 person found this review helpful
164.1 hrs on record (163.3 hrs at review time)
♥♥♥♥ game
Posted 2 June, 2025. Last edited 23 October, 2025.
Was this review helpful? Yes No Funny Award
No one has rated this review as helpful yet
2
61.9 hrs on record (34.2 hrs at review time)
You see, ladies and gentlemen. When you experience a videogame you otherwise thought was bad, alongside a femboy. Your look on the world changes, you realize that the game isn't so bad.

This is what I experienced, and I hope you all do too, if nothing else, I have a complaint about the fact that the game lacks thicc thigh femboys and big booty latinas. Much love, Ban
Posted 29 May, 2025. Last edited 25 June, 2025.
Was this review helpful? Yes No Funny Award
No one has rated this review as helpful yet
124.1 hrs on record (119.6 hrs at review time)
If I could I'd refund this ♥♥♥♥♥ rn
Posted 31 May, 2024. Last edited 5 April, 2025.
Was this review helpful? Yes No Funny Award
No one has rated this review as helpful yet
15.1 hrs on record (0.5 hrs at review time)
This ♥♥♥♥ some ass
Posted 7 April, 2024.
Was this review helpful? Yes No Funny Award
No one has rated this review as helpful yet
724.1 hrs on record (707.3 hrs at review time)
500 hours: ♥♥♥♥ game


600 hour update: still ♥♥♥♥ game


700 hour update: ♥♥♥♥ but mag7 and femboy
Posted 24 May, 2022. Last edited 30 October, 2025.
Was this review helpful? Yes No Funny Award
Showing 1-7 of 7 entries