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I caught this guy ♥♥♥♥ing my girlfriend last week. I’m still ♥♥♥♥♥♥ about it but there’s nothing I can do. She loves him. I knew she was acting weird because she kept staying out late and coming home with taco sauce on her blouse. During sex she’d scream to give her my five dollar foot long, but I’m only 3 inches and five dollars is way too much for what I’m giving. One day I came home to find her getting plowed against the wall by this dude. He had her hair in one hand and a taco bell cheesy gordita crunch in the other. I tried to fight him, but he slapped me so hard it broke every window in the house. This dude’s a stone cold pimp and I can’t do anything to hurt him, so I can only hope he breaks her heart one day like she broke mine.
After a good game of csgo, I added him because he seemed like a cool guy. We got to chat, over the next couple of months we became good friends. Lots of banter, lots of great CS and most importantly true friendship.
I invited him to my house for a csgo lan party. He said he was coming so I was looking forward to meeting him in real life.
When he arrived at my house, he pushed me against the wall and started nibbling my ear, I felt his hard ♥♥♥♥ pushing against my leg. I punched him and then 1 tapped him. Turns out he was gay. Don't trust this guy.
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╰┓┳╰╯┳┏╯ Special Delivery For A Super Awesome Friend! <3
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