you are a smelly poopoo head who is a haybo and should not be alive because he is a straw hat that smells like cheese and I'm going to shjank ur nan

[S.E.T.H] Milton: k cool
[S.E.T.H] Dj Peatz: Okay, cool.*
[S.E.T.H] Milton: k cool
[S.E.T.H] Dj Peatz: You are right Peter, I did mean e = mc^2. Also, you are a cool person that is way cooler than me. I am rich.*
[S.E.T.H] Milton: k cool



Item #: SCP-69-J

Object Class: keter - oh god kill it.

Special Containment Procedures: SCP-69-J is to be kept in a rabbit-lined containment chamber located in peters penis, where it is to be guarded at all times by no less than 1.69 professional ♥♥♥♥♥ destroyer armed with plastic bags.

In the event that SCP-69-J ever begins ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ its peters right testicle, dr. bright is to flying SCP-69-J until it ceases its behavior. In the event of a containment breach, Mobile Task Force ψ-7 (''Lazy Town'') is to be dispatched to SCP-69-J's last known location.

Description: SCP-69-J is a cloudy mountain chicken. Like most members of its species, it is able to inserting dildo, and regularly eats twice its own weight in rabbit each day.

SCP-69-J's unusual properties manifest whenever it comes in contact with ernies, which causes it to turn into blacks. Whenever this happens, all boobs within a 420 kilometer radius will begin to destroying puss uncontrollably, usually leading to civilian casualties.

In addition, many researchers feel it has an uncanny resemblance to Blueface153. Whether or not this is at all related to SCP-69-J's anomalous properties is unknown at this time.

Recovery Log: SCP-69-J was first located in ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ where the fransansico 49-er's were using it in order to turning everyone into a robot. Thankfully, Mobile Task Force ψ-7 (''Lazy Town'') was able to recover the object with only 420 civilian casualties.

Addendum: Test Log 69-1

Dr. hitler: Ello? Ello? Is zhis thing on? Ach, good. Zhis is Docktorr hitler, and I am about to test SCP-69's reaction to Penis. Are you ready to proceed, Docktorr Holmes?
Dr. Holmes: Yes sir, ready to begin test.

Dr. hitler: Excellent! I am now introducing the Penis to 69... hmm, zhe subject seems to have already figured out zhe test material.

Dr. Holmes: Making a note; 'subject shows high capacity for learning'.

hitler: Now zhe subject is lookink right at me, almost as if it... MEIN GOTT! MEIN butthole! IT'S GOT MEIN butthole! OH ZHE AGONY! ZHE AGONEEEEEEEEEEEEY!

END LOG

In light of incident 69-J-1, testing has been suspended indefinitely. - O5-█