Recent reviews by Petroleum Enthusiast

If you every play TTT, you will very quickly learn to hate anyone you play it with. Endless fun for the whole family.
9/10

Not a particularly polished game, but hot damn does it feel good to get on the intercom and advertise Coles car insurance

You know, there aren’t many series that have managed to hold such a consistent improvement among their sequels. Even games that I thought I would carry on into adult hood have fallen to the way side as I have gotten older. Franchises like Halo and Pokemon, which I never imagined loosing faith in have consistently betrayed my trust. And while I still hold out hope for the next instalments of those properties. I have largely lost interest. But not with Bloons, oh no. I am under the impression that Ninja Kiwi are a gift from god, on a holy mission to wage war on the game industry with an IP that in my opinion, has never miss stepped. The level of care put into this series. From its humble roots as a browser flash game, to what is now an intricate, strategic and expansive tower defence game. Every step of the journey has been a beautiful pilgrimage. Evolving and adding a metric ton of towers, strategies, maps, heroes. It brings a tear to the eye. And if that wasn’t enough, the game is constantly supported with updates bringing new toys to keep your interest. I really don’t need to talk any longer, if you have played tower defence games you should very well know how legendary this series is, and if you don’t, then you need to jump in. Even if you don’t fancy yourself as a tower defence player, this is about as good as it gets. Thank you Ninja Kiwi, for making sure I will never truly be bored. You will always have my attention.
Masterpiece.

I have wasted copious amounts of hours on this game. And I have been rewarded in no manner. The PvP in this game is an intolerable mess. Filled to the brim with 1 hit abilities, absurd amounts of flinch, heavy ammo that respawns far too often and exotics that give wallhacks, make you invincible or essentially allow you to cheat. And then the PvE..... AI are imbeciles, there is no actual difficulty. The only time it becomes remotely tough is when you get swarmed by a mob of thrall in a manner not dissimilar to holding the last roll of toilet paper at the department store. The only other time you would see difficulty is when you are criminally underleveled for a day one raid because Bungie knows they've lost the magic and the superficial difficulty is the only thing that will make it challenging. Oh yeah, notice how I haven't mentioned the story? Well I will continue to not speak of it.

I swear this game is the definition of the Nightingale effect. It is a heaping pile of hot trash and yet here we are continuing to play it. Video games have fallen so far in recent years and this is a prime example. To hell with this game. This virus is a time vampire like no other, so I will give it a positive review. Not because I enjoyed any of it, I just hope some poor bastard stumbles on it and makes the mistake of installing it.

Just get it

So much DLC was released before the game hit version 1.0, Game just feels unloved to me. Wish I could get my money back. The physics are amazing, AI is a bit meh. I just can't get over the idea that I payed for a game that had DLC before it was finished. Maybe they needed money to complete the game? I don't know.

9/10 for the feeling of the driving experience, 3/10 for the feeling of the overall product.

Who doesn't love being devoured by a worm?

7/10

It's not often I come across a hidden treasure. This game in all its clunky and semi polished glory remains one of the greatest games I have ever played.

But what makes it so special?

The game blends together two of my favorite genres into this beautiful medley of shooting mechanics and tower defense. This combination is so good that it almost single-handedly makes up for any of its short comings.

The game features a cast of 4 characters (5 with dlc) that each have their own special traits. Further this with a large array of weapons and perks, the level of creativity and customization is obscene. Albeit not all perks were created equal. But that is what makes it so much fun, the journey, the testing, the combinations. Nothing is more satisfying than building a new class and feeling everything click together when you deal 50k damage in a single shot.

There is a simple narrative stringing the maps of the game together in the form of a comic before each level. It's the absolute bare minimum story telling and yet it works. What little of the world we see is interesting and particularly at the end of missions like sokol the impact of your actions are truly felt.

The enemies are a bunch of alien bug like creatures called looms that vary in shape, size and temperament. And together make a good cast of enemies to fend off. And likewise being a tower defense we too have a whole heap of towers to help us on our quest to save the planet from annihilation.

However for as much as I love this game with the feeling of sheer joy I have whenever I reminisce on it. It isn't without it's faults. This game has no consistent difficulty, one mission you will get your teeth kicked in and the next you'll likely forget there is an oncoming wave and go exploring.

The towers and weapons you have are terribly balanced, to the point where using some of them can be considered actively throwing (and you bet your ass I run all of them). While others are nearly mandatory, looking at you focus laser. And then some of the enemy designs are just painful, where with the exception of a few solutions are completely invulnerable.

And frankly the perk system is incredibly confusing to wrap your head around. What would appear to be a strong build on paper ends up being as effective as my attempts at comedy.

But you know what? non of that matters. Because when I jump on sanctum 2 I know I'll have fun. And even when the meta strategy has been solved in my mind. I still push on with trying outrages play lines just for the hell of it. Sanctum 2 in many ways is an incomplete, unbalanced and broken mess. But it's my broken mess. And I never want it to change.

Orbital Strike Relay/10

The go outside achievement is truly a sight to behold

9/10

Basically Terraria with a short story, infinite planets but with fewer items to collect. Mobs don't drop items so farming rare items is less about finding a rare creature and killing it but instead getting lucky when looting chests. The Mobs also look randomly generated so they never feel special or unique. I can name many creatures In terraria that are hard to find and feel special, e.g. a mimic, that can be very difficult to kill but gives great loot if you are able to slay it. Starbound is by no means a bad game, but it will take time to build the game up to a point where it could possibly contest Terraria. The way loot is acquired, how boss fights are handled, rewards for exploring the world etc are all done better in Terraria as of writing this. If I was choosing between this game and Terraria, It would be Terraria everytime. If you already play Terraria and want to try someting similar, I would just add some mods to Terraria for now. I do however recommend this game as a stand alone product not comparing it to anything else.

6/10