I have the ears of a bat and I masturbate like Solid Snake. I've been jerking it since I was 6 years old, and didn't know what I was doing. I have never been caught. I've learned to hold my breath and not make noises too, so I feel like a ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ ninja.

I'm just a paranoid ♥♥♥♥ who goes to great lengths to ensure privacy.