♥♥♥♥ you, you piece of ♥♥♥♥. I bet I have had stronger orgasms than you can ever imagine. Just absolutely amazing ♥♥♥♥, with tremendous bursts of pleasurable feeling. I am glad that delicious pleasure is reserved for those of us who have the balls to do what we want to do, with none for scared ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ like you. You have to settle for your tiny little "ah" dribble of ♥♥♥, when I am ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ spunking buckets in ecstasy like a real man. You're a tiny ♥♥♥♥♥♥ shrimp and your ♥♥♥♥ has never felt like mine. Big, hard, and rippling with deadly joy.

"Wait!" he said, pulling my shoulder. "I know it sounds weird, but I'm more into a more... feminine boys, so I got a proposition."
He pulls out a fleshlight from under his bed. This was it. This was what was looking for!
I swear, that day, I could spin the rings of Saturn on my ♥♥♥♥ with how hard I was.
He shoved that fleshlight up my ass, jerked me off from behind and we went hard.
I've never climaxed so hard in my life, I thought I was going to die. I could've easily put Three Gorges Dam to shame with how much I was letting out.
Anyway, that's what anime did to me.

When she unpants me, she was welcome with a sad flaccid ♥♥♥♥-of-a-thing. After a bit, we couldn't get me going, so she left. Whatever, it's not like I haven't disappointed people before.
But finally, one time, I met a cute boy that looked like a girl. I was totally down for it, and he seemed surprised that I was for it. But he jumped at the opportunity since no one ever found interest in him.
When we got to his place, we went straight at it. We started to rip off our clothes before we even got into his living room. I unpants him, and to my surprise, he wasn't erected.
I was confused. I looked back up at him with sad eyes.
"I'm sorry." he said "I'm actually more into... girls."
My life shattered before my eyes. This reality where boys are more attracted to girls than boys was tearing me up. I slowly got up, and started to pick up my clothes.

I think anime really has twisted how I perceive most genders now.
I know tumblr has like, 80 genders or something, but anime has shown me interesting things that have changed my understanding of certain things. Like, every time I find a really attractive girl, I always think she has a larger ♥♥♥♥ than I do. And for some reason, it's like, baffling if I don't see a bulge in her swimsuit/underwear.
I remember bedding someone once, and things were getting steamy. I started to take her clothes off, and as she did mine. We've finally got to the pants, I awaited to be hit on the chin with a large, veiny, erected ♥♥♥♥. But alas, my chin was undickedified.
"But where's your feminine ♥♥♥♥?" I muttered to myself.
"What did you say down there?"
"Nothing."

Typical anti-intellectual. What's your favorite composer? Can you even name one? What about your favorite time signature? Favorite classical style cellist, pianist, and violinist?

Let me guess, you enjoy Coil, Comus, and This Heat because they're "influential, interesting, experimental, and strange"?

"You know what? No," said the executioner. "I've had it with you and your stupid bananas and walking out of here unharmed. I'm not giving you a thing to eat, we're strapping you in and doing this now." Well, it was against protocol, but the man was strapped in to the electric chair without a last meal. The switch was pulled, sparks flew, smoke filled the room- and the man was still unharmed. The executioner was speechless.

The man looked at the executioner and said "Oh, the bananas had nothing to do with it. I'm just a bad conductor."