One. Yes you read that right. One, singular eye. You know what? It's open, even perhaps whilst I am sleeping. One eye.

Top 5 things to know about me:
1. No.1 fan of my local Republican representative.
2. Purveyor of personal use recreational firearms (under the second amendment) .
3. Tampa Bay Rays unofficial physiotherapist.
4. Gas station connoisseur.
5. Disdain towards cleaning equipment, most notably brooms (and/or mops).