I onced asked my friend "If you were a goat, would you hide your turkey in an open field?". She answered "No, it would be to hard to find. I'd hide it in a lagoon." All of a sudden, Bob the PieMaster comes runnig out screaming "SASSAFRASS!!! SASSAFRASS!! BEWARE OF THE JINGLE CAGE SASSAFRASS!!!" Bob is awfully stupid, so we just put on our chocolate earmuffs and head for NeverLand. Half-way there, El Chupacabra jumps out of a blueberry orange grove with a bottle of ketchup. I pull out a bottle of mustard from my portable Mazda Miata and hand it to him. He stares at it, then pours them both on my friend and eats her. I continue to walk to NeverLand. I can just see the outline of Darth Vader's flying pony when out of nowhere, a giant cube-shaped eskimo plummets out of the sky and falls on me. I die. El Chupacabra laughs, and Bob pops out of his magic space portal, waves his fist in the air, and says "I TOLD YOU TO BEWARE OF THE SASSAFRASS!!!"

the end