We live in a state of suspension, suspended mid air in a vat of our own deceit and crimes, with the rays of change burning our skin, but even in this state of desperation and turmoil, we wish not to change but to endure. To endure and keep enduring, as that pain is all too common now, we are afraid that the warmth of change and healing will burn whatever we have known and held for so long. We are not afraid of hurt, we are afraid to be hurt in new ways that are inevitable with the warm waters of change. We are blind to what this warm sweet water may bring, a new self, a better stronger self that is able. We don't wish to suffer but it is suffering that we are the most comfortable with, hence we stay suspended, mid air in our desperation, in the pain that we have known for decades and thousands of years, afraid to fall and wake up.