The Lard's Prayer

Our Gaben, who art in Bellevue
Rotund be thy shape
The half-life (never) come
Thy will be done on earth
as it is in Valve
Give us this day our daily vidya
And forgive us for our pirating
as we forgive those who pirate alongside us
May VAC lead us not into temptation
but deliver us from hacking
For thine kingdom is the VALVe
the Steam, and the vidya
For ever and ever
Gaben

Our Father Who AWPs in heaven
CS be thy game,
Uncase begun, them skins be won, Convert- and not a Mil-Spec.
Give us this day a StatTrak knife
And forgive us when we rage quit
As we forgive those who aimbot against us
And lead us not into scamnation
Undeliver us a Battle Scarred
Gaben.

lord Gaben who art in Steam, hallowed be thy game
Your half-life come, when will be done?
On Steam, as it is on Origin.
Give us this day our daily sales
and be rid us of our wallets,
as we also, have given our wallets.
And lead us not into Full Prices,
but deliver us with discounts.