I have a huge penis worthy of legendary status. Just dropping it out onto a desk causes echos for years throughout the halls of education.


I just want to brag. A week ago I took a 11 inch ♥♥♥♥, that's basically a subway footlong. A little thicker than a hotdog. Maybe a german sausage thick. I barely felt the last couple of inchs, it was like heaven. I needed to cut it up with a wooden spoon, it cost me $5 to get a new one.


Colin your kneeling has taken a toll on my marriage. I can't achieve an erection during intercourse anymore because I'm too angry thinking about how you disrespect the flag and the troops. I hope you're happy.

There's a guy who works for a different business on my floor. He always says hi when he sees me. Really nice guy. The first time he talked to me at the urinals he said, "Workin' with a small one over here!" I replied, "Uhhhh... I'm... I'm sorry to hear that." Then I realized he was referring to the size of the urinal

I worked security at an aquatic theme park and was watching Jeopardy in the employee entrance. One of the veterinarians came through and watched it with me for a bit. He said he watches it religiously and he'd passed the test for the show and was hoping to get selected. He'd heard that they like to have a diverse group of contestants, and they hadn't had a black guy for a while, so he liked his chances. A few days later, there are two black contestants, so when I see him leaving the next time I say, "hey, did you catch Jeopardy last week?" "No, why?", he responds. "There were two black guys on it", I explain. He just stares at me blankly for a few seconds, and walks off. That's when I realized it was a different gentleman than I had the previous conversation with.

People think it's gay, but the Male g-spot is in the ass and I'll be damned if society is gonna keep me from getting a better nut

Fellas, when you sit while peeing into a urinal, do you sit on the floor & aim your stream up like a rainbow OR do you face away from the urinal, squat in the half-dish and fold your penis backwards so you can pee behind you?.

Also, dont try to come in and talk to me about your infidelity while I'm cry-♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥. That's my rock bottom. Let me be my own Patrick Starr for a second.