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A work by William Shakespeare.
ACT I. Scene I.
The zoo. An orangutan enclosure.
Enter LE MONKE, a corpulent ape.
LE MONKE
Oh bother, a foul smell!
Fecal matter!
Ha-ha-ha, hilarious, defecate material.
The ape laughs continuously. It screeches vociferously.
LE MONKE
Hooray for excrement! Congenial fecal matter! Defecation is jocular, ha-ha!
Fecal matter pertains to my satisfaction, ho-ho.
The maniacal creature continues to shriek vehemently in a nonsensical fashion.
LE MONKE
Oh bother-- I believe, perchance, I may have created indurated excrement originating from my posterior.
The wretched creation begins to chortle ominously.
LE MONKE
Fecal matter in my trousers... without undergarments! This is exhilarating.
By the nine divines, my undergarments are stained with excrement. Ho-ho-ho.
We yearn for fecal matter! We yearn for fecal matter!