My name is Agutu Mebicke.
I was a child soldier born in Gamboma,Congo.
After fighting many wars for my warchief Mufasa Fasagan M´♥♥♥♥ (English translation:"He who conquers Anus ").
I escaped during a standard night time rape,one of my specialities as a memba of the Elite Tunnel Snake Child Army I realised I could not live like this.

At the time of 14 years of age,my only work experience was kidnapping and dudu fadende (English translation:"Advanced Afriken groping").

I ran to a nearby village and traded my rifle for food and water,the farmer then traded with me then mugged me at gunpoint forcing me to give up my food and water in exchange for my rifle.
Discouraged,I went to anotha village only to find devastation as the village had been a victim of a recent rape storm sweepin the region.

After foraging through the trash can I found several lumps of coal and lemon,I combined these togheter to create a Nvidia graphics card .
Just then,a man dying from the rape pulled my leg and said:˝Brudda,the only way out of here is to becom a yutub superstaa,I tell u it is true,my friend made a whole 5 US dollas˝
˝5 US dollas˝ I thought to myself ˝well that is the equivalent to 5 billion Zimbabwean rupies.˝
˝BRUDDA!˝ The man said to me again ˝take mah alienware gaming rig,it has only brought mah family ruin,go and become famous yutuber.˝

With these final words,the man finally subcomed to bullet poisonin.
Since then,I changed my voice to sound more American to appeal to the white devils.
In truth I don´t even know what a video game is and yet here I am.