AQT

Own a hand cannon for home defense, since that's what our one true king Wenceslas intended. Four vagabonds break into my tower house. "What's the meaning of this?" As I grab my Kettle Hat and Master's Handgonne. Blow a golf ball sized hole through the first man, he's dead on the spot. Draw my Pistole on the second man, miss him entirely because it's low quality and nails the neighbors dog. I have to resort to the Bombard mounted at the top of the stairs loaded with stone shot, "To the task!" the shot shreds two men in the blast, the sound and extra shrapnel wake up the entire village. Draw my Rondel Dagger and charge the last terrified bastard. He bleeds out waiting on the sawbones to arrive, since triangular stab wounds are impossible to stitch up. Just as God and King Wenceslas intended.

im witerawy gwiddying on your pwofile wight now

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I kind of wish all the giant type bosses in games had a humongous monster schlong dangling around freely in the wind with very realistic physics emulation that could deal damage to your character if it hits you with enough force. They could also get pretty creative with some of the attack animations, like using their massive ♥♥♥♥ like a propeller by spinning it around causing a knock-back effect. Just an example.

And lastly it would be pretty neat if you could cut it off for an unique boss weapon while degrading their current move-set as a way to reward you for your strategic gameplay. Like tail cutting from the very first Dark Souls.

I think it would add some depth to the overall gameplay experience when it comes to those type of bosses personally.

own a longsword for home defense, just like ye lordes of old intended. four rapscallions break into my cottage. “the bloody ♥♥♥♥?” as i grab my helm and swordbelt. ram a five foot blade into the first man, he’s dead on the spot. draw my seax on the second man, it doesn’t penetrate mail because it’s british and bruises his ribs. i have to resort to the ballistae mounted at the top of the stairs loaded with a serrated point, “your mother was a hamster and your father smells of elderberries!” the bolt catches two men and shreds them, the force cracks my sidewalk and sends concrete flying. draw flail and run down the last terrified bandit. he dies of brain damage waiting for the police to arrive since blunt force trauma can’t be healed. just as the lordes of olde intended.