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ㅤ* A pessimist is someone who looks at the land of milk and honey and sees only calories and cholesterol.
ㅤ* How do you get holy water? Boil the hell out of it.
ㅤ* Whizzing round a sharp bend on a country road a motorist ran over a large dog. A distraught farmer's wife ran over to the dead animal. "I'm so very sorry", said the driver, "I'll replace him, of course." "Well, I don't know", said the farmer's wife, "Are you any good at catching rats?"
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