Hey guys,

Its me. I know you have all been longing to hear from me, so here it is: No I am not high on Sudafed and I'm not moving to the Congo. However if either of those should eventually prove to be true, rest assured, I will update you all posthaste.

Furthermore, we must take the time to welcome our new members--who are so new I forgot most of them--so just thank some people in general for vague things and it will all work out. On a side note, be kind to Cameron, since we all know he lives a hard life and has a hard time struggling with his internal gayness, so everyone just be supportive of him and he'll be okay. I write the best letters and everyone knows it, so if you disagree its probably because you're wrong or you're just dumb. The end, comrades.


~Your weird uncle Timmy