Ask nicely and maybe I'll give you an autograph

I know, quite high in demand. Lots of people want mine. It has been proven to be fairly difficult to obtain, some may even say impossible. And they're right. Many have died in the process of seeking my sacred lettering.

What makes you think that I would give my autograph to you? My personal signature, a representation of the ideal man, the top 1% of humanity. Do you have any idea how much one must sacrifice, to receive such treasures?

As my auntie always said, if you want a chicken don't buy a cow. Why? Because you want a chicken? Duh? Why would you get a cow?

What does that have to do with any of this? Nothing. Join the group and I'll give you a free autograph out of the kindness of my heart.

Free Autographs[http//Free+Autographs]